I want to exert my fullest in the world of Soka Gakkai
Ryoichi Kinta
Japan
“Perhaps there was a switch in the heart of everyone, and the switch in my heart has been switched off?”
When I was studying in Primary 1 and 2, this thought came up unknowingly.
The reason why I kept thinking this way was that I could not recall what happened before I was 5 years old. All I could remember was that I was brought to an unknown family by a stranger.
I only got to understand when I was Primary 4. On that fateful day, my father called me in front of the altar in the presence of my mother and grandmother, with a strange feeling. My mind went completely blank after being told of my birth by my mother.
My mother told me that I was discarded by my real parents not too long after I was borned, and was placed in an orphanage. I had never met my real parents before. When I was 5 years old, I was then adopted by this family.
In my heart I thought, “What! How could this be possible!”
“I understand! Enough!” I cut their talk and walked away from the altar.
“So all of you were pretending to be my real parents, and lying to me all these while. I hate adults! Hate human beings!” An unbelievable feeling of rejection and anger well frothed. Finally I understood why I was frequently beaten up by my mother mercilessly.
When I was Primary 6, my parents divorced and I lived together with my father.
The meaning of “single-mindedness”
When I was studying in high school, I became rebellious and was arrested to the police station many a times. In spite of this, my father always treated me like an adult, with respect.
I joined the baseball team as I was coached by my father on how to throw and catch the ball.Regarding the collective memories of my father and me, it was only those frequent visits to Amagasaki Culture Center with him, and nothing else.
In the 3rd year of my high school, my grandmother told me that my father had contracted cancer. I was not caught by surprise at that time, as I felt that my father would never pass away due to cancer. In contrast, the situation went the opposite direction. My father became frailer as the days went by. He passed away that summer.
Before my father passed away, he lay on the bed and told me, “Ryoichi, do you know what is the meaning of “single-mindedness?” I replied, “What’s that?” My father explained, “It means to focus entirely on one thing at a time, be determined and work hard to complete it. Remember! Victory must be achieved no matter what!” This was the last words that my father left me with.
I was then staying with my grandmother, but I was suffering and felt perturbed, “Why am I born in this world? Where do I truly belongs to?”
I continued to stay with my grandmother until I graduated from high school. One day, my grandmother left house and never returned. When I was working in society, the visitors were not my grandmother but the Young Men’s Division (YMD) members in Soka Gakkai instead.
I was clueless when I spoke but my seniors-in-faith listened with tremendous patience. In spite of their effort, I was neither grateful nor happy.
Not long later, a relative told me that my grandmother who left me was admitted to the nursing home, and passed away not long after. Perhaps I was regarded as an outsider, or perhaps they felt that they needed not inform every single person, I realized it could all be due to the fact that we were not related in blood. At that time, I felt truly alone, without the strength to pick myself up to do anything.
The YMD senior-in-faith was worried that I could be feeling down and depressed, and invited me to have a dialogue with them at his place.
“I do not need family members! I do not trust anyone!” I spoke with anger and frustration. My senior-in-faith spoke calmly to me, “But I regard you as the most important person in my family!”
“My family” – this was the first time I heard someone said that to me in my life. In my heart and mind, I thought about the meaning of these words over and over again.
Due to this, I opened my heart a little which was once tightly closed, and also developed the urge to try out the Buddhist practice which my father and grandmother undertook when they were alive.
Hope you would achieve happiness
Together with my YMD comrades, I participated actively in the Soka Gakkai’s activities, and under the urging of my senior-in-faith, I joined the Sokahan’s Group. “Would you like to try shakubuku (converting others’ to this Buddhist practice)? You know, it would change the way your views of this world.”My senior-in-faith inspired me, bringing forth my fighting spirit. I thought to myself, “What’s so great about that? I can do it too!”
So I chanted, and telling my friend in high school with tenacity, “Let’s achieve happiness together!” To my surprise, my friend replied readily, “Well, since you say that… “.He agreed to accept this faith, and became the first shakubuku of my life. I felt a sense of unbelievable fulfilment and happiness.
At that time, the previous image of my father when he was alive showed up in my mind. I remembered my father used to bring me to the place where he tried to shakubuku when I was young. He would shed tears and tell his friend, “It is ok that I am unfortunate, but with all my heart, I wish you would become truly happy because of this practice.”
The reason of those tears of my father, I felt, was actually trying to convince the obstinate me! Isn’t this what he taught me, “The heart to show concern to others, the heart to believe in others, the stance and behavior of a human being…” I fought back my tears, looking far into the skies.
“Single-mindedness” – I finally understood what it meant “to focus entirely on one thing at a time “, these last word from my father. That was, my father wished that I would live and exert myself to the fullest, in the world of faith, the world of Soka Gakkai where he devoted his entire life!
Compared to what I was before, my views of this world are entirely different. Without a doubt, I have found the place where I truly belong. And that is none other than the Amagasaki Culture Center, the place that my father used to frequent.
Whenever I am having dialogue on various topics with my YMD comrades, I cannot help but to think, “Oh! There are family members in this place.”
(Jiao Xue Yan Xi, Dec 2012)
(translated from Daibyakurenge, Aug 2001)
Translation Disclaimer: The original testimonial is in the Chinese Language. It has been translated to the English Language for our readers’ convenience. Reasonable efforts have been made to provide an accurate translation, however the editorial team acknowledged that the translation may not be perfect to the author’s original and seeks our readers understanding. Please note that all guidance and quotes are loosely translated.
(编辑注释: 以上是中英翻译，原版如下.)
我要在學會的世界奮鬥到底
菌田良一
日本
「說不定每個人的心中都有一個開關，而我心中的開關被關掉了吧？」
讀小學一、二年級時，我總會不經意地思考這件事。
会這麽想是因為我完全想不起來五歲前的事，僅依稀記得被陌生人帶到一個陌生家庭，如此而已。
得知原由是在我小學四年級時。那天，父親把我叫到佛堂，母親和袓母也在場，神情怪異。接著從母親口中得知身世，腦中頓時一片空白。
母親說我出生不久，即被雙親遺棄，安置於孤兒院，不曾見過親生父母。五歲時，被他們收養。
「什麼！怎麼會是這樣！」我心想。
「知道了！夠了！」我打斷他們的話，走出佛堂。
「原來他們裝作我的親生父母，一直都在騙我。我討厭大人！討厭人！」難以言喻的失落感和憤怒，一湧而上。我總算明白常挨母親無情的打罵，就是這個原因。
小學六年級時，父母離婚，我和父親一起生活。
何謂「一意專心」
升上國中，我開始變壞，常被帶到警察局，但我覺得父親始終把我當作一個大人來對待我。
加入棒球隊，也是因為小時候父親曾教我投球、接球。說到與父親的回憶，就是經常和他到尼崎文化會館，除此之外，沒有兩人一起外出的記憶。
國三時，祖母告訴我父親罹患癌症。當時我並不驚訝，因為我覺得父親不會因此而死。沒想到，事與願違，父親日漸衰弱，在那年夏天就病逝。
去世前，躺在床上的父親對我說：「良一，你知道『一意專心』這句話嗎？」我問：「那是什麼意思？」父親解釋：「這是指，專心於一件事，下定決心努力完成。記住喔！不管任何事，也要取得勝利！」這是父親留給我的最後遺言。
我變成跟祖母一起生活，但常苦惱、痛苦地想：「為什麼我會出生在這世上？哪裡才是我容身之處？」
和祖母一起生活到高中畢業，有一天，祖母只說外出一下，就一去不回。出社會後，來住宿地方找我的人並非祖母，而是學會的男子部們。
我說話毫無頭緖，但前輩們總是耐心傾聽。雖說如此，我也沒因此感謝他們或為此高興。
不久，有位親戚告訴我，袓母離開我之後住進療養院，不久便過世了。和他們毫無血緣關係的我，終究只是個外人，或許他們認為沒必要一一告知。這下我真的孑然一身了，感覺全身無力，什麼都提不起勁。
男子部前輩擔心我為此意氣消沉，邀請我到他家談談。
「我不需要家人！我不相信任何人！」我一吐心中的怒氣和悲傷，前輩以平靜的口吻對我說：「但我把你當作我最重要的家人看待哦！」
「我的家人」-- 聽到有人對我這麼說，還是生平第一次。我在心中不斷咀嚼這句的意思。
於是，我感受到原本對人緊閉的心扉打開了 一點，也生起想試試父親和祖母生前的信仰的想法。
希望你能獲得幸福
我和男子部夥伴們勤勵於學會活動，也在前輩的敦促下，加入了創價班行列。「要不要試著折伏看看？看世界的角度會變得不一樣喔。」前輩的鼓勵激起我的鬥志：「那有什麼了不起！我也可以做到。」
我朗朗唱題，拚命地向高中友人訴說：「一起獲得幸福吧！」沒想到友人爽快回答：「既然你都這麼說了。」決意入信，達成了我人生首次的折伏成果，感到心裡充滿著無法言喩的充實感和喜悅感。
那時，腦海突然浮現父親生前的身影。我記得父親常帶年幼的我到折伏的地方，留著眼淚對其友人說：「我不幸福也無所謂，但我衷心希望你能透過這個信心獲得幸福。」
父親的眼淚，不就是在對著一直苦於不相信人的我傳達這個訊息嗎！不正是在教導我：「為他人著想的心、相信別人的心、身為人的姿態……」，我強忍住淚水，仰望著天空。
「一意專心」-- 父親臨終前想告訴我「專心於一件事」的意思，我終於明白了。那就是，父親希望我在他貫徹一生的信心的世界、學會的世界，活到底、奮鬥到底！
和以前比較的話，現在的我看見的世界，的確是不一樣了。我已找到容身之處，沒錯！那就是和父親常去的尼崎文化會館。
當我在此與男子部夥伴們談論各種話題時，就會不由自主地想：「啊！這裡有我的家人。」
(卓碗真譯自《大白蓮華》二〇一 一年八月)
[2012年12月教學研習]
Ryoichi Kinta
Japan
“Perhaps there was a switch in the heart of everyone, and the switch in my heart has been switched off?”
When I was studying in Primary 1 and 2, this thought came up unknowingly.
The reason why I kept thinking this way was that I could not recall what happened before I was 5 years old. All I could remember was that I was brought to an unknown family by a stranger.
I only got to understand when I was Primary 4. On that fateful day, my father called me in front of the altar in the presence of my mother and grandmother, with a strange feeling. My mind went completely blank after being told of my birth by my mother.
My mother told me that I was discarded by my real parents not too long after I was borned, and was placed in an orphanage. I had never met my real parents before. When I was 5 years old, I was then adopted by this family.
In my heart I thought, “What! How could this be possible!”
“I understand! Enough!” I cut their talk and walked away from the altar.
“So all of you were pretending to be my real parents, and lying to me all these while. I hate adults! Hate human beings!” An unbelievable feeling of rejection and anger well frothed. Finally I understood why I was frequently beaten up by my mother mercilessly.
When I was Primary 6, my parents divorced and I lived together with my father.
The meaning of “single-mindedness”
When I was studying in high school, I became rebellious and was arrested to the police station many a times. In spite of this, my father always treated me like an adult, with respect.
I joined the baseball team as I was coached by my father on how to throw and catch the ball.Regarding the collective memories of my father and me, it was only those frequent visits to Amagasaki Culture Center with him, and nothing else.
In the 3rd year of my high school, my grandmother told me that my father had contracted cancer. I was not caught by surprise at that time, as I felt that my father would never pass away due to cancer. In contrast, the situation went the opposite direction. My father became frailer as the days went by. He passed away that summer.
Before my father passed away, he lay on the bed and told me, “Ryoichi, do you know what is the meaning of “single-mindedness?” I replied, “What’s that?” My father explained, “It means to focus entirely on one thing at a time, be determined and work hard to complete it. Remember! Victory must be achieved no matter what!” This was the last words that my father left me with.
I was then staying with my grandmother, but I was suffering and felt perturbed, “Why am I born in this world? Where do I truly belongs to?”
I continued to stay with my grandmother until I graduated from high school. One day, my grandmother left house and never returned. When I was working in society, the visitors were not my grandmother but the Young Men’s Division (YMD) members in Soka Gakkai instead.
I was clueless when I spoke but my seniors-in-faith listened with tremendous patience. In spite of their effort, I was neither grateful nor happy.
Not long later, a relative told me that my grandmother who left me was admitted to the nursing home, and passed away not long after. Perhaps I was regarded as an outsider, or perhaps they felt that they needed not inform every single person, I realized it could all be due to the fact that we were not related in blood. At that time, I felt truly alone, without the strength to pick myself up to do anything.
The YMD senior-in-faith was worried that I could be feeling down and depressed, and invited me to have a dialogue with them at his place.
“I do not need family members! I do not trust anyone!” I spoke with anger and frustration. My senior-in-faith spoke calmly to me, “But I regard you as the most important person in my family!”
“My family” – this was the first time I heard someone said that to me in my life. In my heart and mind, I thought about the meaning of these words over and over again.
Due to this, I opened my heart a little which was once tightly closed, and also developed the urge to try out the Buddhist practice which my father and grandmother undertook when they were alive.
Hope you would achieve happiness
Together with my YMD comrades, I participated actively in the Soka Gakkai’s activities, and under the urging of my senior-in-faith, I joined the Sokahan’s Group. “Would you like to try shakubuku (converting others’ to this Buddhist practice)? You know, it would change the way your views of this world.”My senior-in-faith inspired me, bringing forth my fighting spirit. I thought to myself, “What’s so great about that? I can do it too!”
So I chanted, and telling my friend in high school with tenacity, “Let’s achieve happiness together!” To my surprise, my friend replied readily, “Well, since you say that… “.He agreed to accept this faith, and became the first shakubuku of my life. I felt a sense of unbelievable fulfilment and happiness.
At that time, the previous image of my father when he was alive showed up in my mind. I remembered my father used to bring me to the place where he tried to shakubuku when I was young. He would shed tears and tell his friend, “It is ok that I am unfortunate, but with all my heart, I wish you would become truly happy because of this practice.”
The reason of those tears of my father, I felt, was actually trying to convince the obstinate me! Isn’t this what he taught me, “The heart to show concern to others, the heart to believe in others, the stance and behavior of a human being…” I fought back my tears, looking far into the skies.
“Single-mindedness” – I finally understood what it meant “to focus entirely on one thing at a time “, these last word from my father. That was, my father wished that I would live and exert myself to the fullest, in the world of faith, the world of Soka Gakkai where he devoted his entire life!
Compared to what I was before, my views of this world are entirely different. Without a doubt, I have found the place where I truly belong. And that is none other than the Amagasaki Culture Center, the place that my father used to frequent.
Whenever I am having dialogue on various topics with my YMD comrades, I cannot help but to think, “Oh! There are family members in this place.”
(Jiao Xue Yan Xi, Dec 2012)
(translated from Daibyakurenge, Aug 2001)
Translation Disclaimer: The original testimonial is in the Chinese Language. It has been translated to the English Language for our readers’ convenience. Reasonable efforts have been made to provide an accurate translation, however the editorial team acknowledged that the translation may not be perfect to the author’s original and seeks our readers understanding. Please note that all guidance and quotes are loosely translated.
(编辑注释: 以上是中英翻译，原版如下.)
我要在學會的世界奮鬥到底
菌田良一
日本
「說不定每個人的心中都有一個開關，而我心中的開關被關掉了吧？」
讀小學一、二年級時，我總會不經意地思考這件事。
会這麽想是因為我完全想不起來五歲前的事，僅依稀記得被陌生人帶到一個陌生家庭，如此而已。
得知原由是在我小學四年級時。那天，父親把我叫到佛堂，母親和袓母也在場，神情怪異。接著從母親口中得知身世，腦中頓時一片空白。
母親說我出生不久，即被雙親遺棄，安置於孤兒院，不曾見過親生父母。五歲時，被他們收養。
「什麼！怎麼會是這樣！」我心想。
「知道了！夠了！」我打斷他們的話，走出佛堂。
「原來他們裝作我的親生父母，一直都在騙我。我討厭大人！討厭人！」難以言喻的失落感和憤怒，一湧而上。我總算明白常挨母親無情的打罵，就是這個原因。
小學六年級時，父母離婚，我和父親一起生活。
何謂「一意專心」
升上國中，我開始變壞，常被帶到警察局，但我覺得父親始終把我當作一個大人來對待我。
加入棒球隊，也是因為小時候父親曾教我投球、接球。說到與父親的回憶，就是經常和他到尼崎文化會館，除此之外，沒有兩人一起外出的記憶。
國三時，祖母告訴我父親罹患癌症。當時我並不驚訝，因為我覺得父親不會因此而死。沒想到，事與願違，父親日漸衰弱，在那年夏天就病逝。
去世前，躺在床上的父親對我說：「良一，你知道『一意專心』這句話嗎？」我問：「那是什麼意思？」父親解釋：「這是指，專心於一件事，下定決心努力完成。記住喔！不管任何事，也要取得勝利！」這是父親留給我的最後遺言。
我變成跟祖母一起生活，但常苦惱、痛苦地想：「為什麼我會出生在這世上？哪裡才是我容身之處？」
和祖母一起生活到高中畢業，有一天，祖母只說外出一下，就一去不回。出社會後，來住宿地方找我的人並非祖母，而是學會的男子部們。
我說話毫無頭緖，但前輩們總是耐心傾聽。雖說如此，我也沒因此感謝他們或為此高興。
不久，有位親戚告訴我，袓母離開我之後住進療養院，不久便過世了。和他們毫無血緣關係的我，終究只是個外人，或許他們認為沒必要一一告知。這下我真的孑然一身了，感覺全身無力，什麼都提不起勁。
男子部前輩擔心我為此意氣消沉，邀請我到他家談談。
「我不需要家人！我不相信任何人！」我一吐心中的怒氣和悲傷，前輩以平靜的口吻對我說：「但我把你當作我最重要的家人看待哦！」
「我的家人」-- 聽到有人對我這麼說，還是生平第一次。我在心中不斷咀嚼這句的意思。
於是，我感受到原本對人緊閉的心扉打開了 一點，也生起想試試父親和祖母生前的信仰的想法。
希望你能獲得幸福
我和男子部夥伴們勤勵於學會活動，也在前輩的敦促下，加入了創價班行列。「要不要試著折伏看看？看世界的角度會變得不一樣喔。」前輩的鼓勵激起我的鬥志：「那有什麼了不起！我也可以做到。」
我朗朗唱題，拚命地向高中友人訴說：「一起獲得幸福吧！」沒想到友人爽快回答：「既然你都這麼說了。」決意入信，達成了我人生首次的折伏成果，感到心裡充滿著無法言喩的充實感和喜悅感。
那時，腦海突然浮現父親生前的身影。我記得父親常帶年幼的我到折伏的地方，留著眼淚對其友人說：「我不幸福也無所謂，但我衷心希望你能透過這個信心獲得幸福。」
父親的眼淚，不就是在對著一直苦於不相信人的我傳達這個訊息嗎！不正是在教導我：「為他人著想的心、相信別人的心、身為人的姿態……」，我強忍住淚水，仰望著天空。
「一意專心」-- 父親臨終前想告訴我「專心於一件事」的意思，我終於明白了。那就是，父親希望我在他貫徹一生的信心的世界、學會的世界，活到底、奮鬥到底！
和以前比較的話，現在的我看見的世界，的確是不一樣了。我已找到容身之處，沒錯！那就是和父親常去的尼崎文化會館。
當我在此與男子部夥伴們談論各種話題時，就會不由自主地想：「啊！這裡有我的家人。」
(卓碗真譯自《大白蓮華》二〇一 一年八月)
[2012年12月教學研習]